Day 24 – An Unexpectedly Long-expected Party


Hello. Ting, ting, ting. Attention! … ATTENTION!

Thank you.

Hi, I’m Camelia, if you don’t know me. (Or even if you do.) They told me I had to give a speech at Perl 6’s official Coming Out Party. So here I am. Someone else is doing the roast. I’m just the toast. They told me it had to be a serious speech. Ha, like I’d know how to give a serious speech. Seriously?

Well. Seriously, I’d like to thank you all for coming out today.

Oops, I guess that was a pun. Sorry. Well, no, not really…

But thanks for showing up. This is a big day for Perl 6. She is officially of age now. Well, kinda sorta. She has her driver’s license, anyway. Watch out, world!

[inaudible comment from a table in back]

Oh, should I not have mentioned that? I wasn’t really talking about those fender benders she had while… Well, anyway, let’s move on. I’m sure she’ll be a really good driver. From now on.

Anyway, I have a great deal of empathy for Perl 6, because I am a butterfly. I too had to spend Far Too Long as a chrysalis before I had my own coming out. A literal coming out in my case. Hah, a literal coming out FROM my case, I should say!

Er, oops. I did it again, didn’t I.

Anyway, please be patient with Perl 6. Today we declare her to be a relatively competent being, but she is still just a teenager, y’know. When we’re very young, we’re just the age we are, but when we get to be teenagers, and go through all these hormonal changes, well, we start to oscillate. And the swings just get wider for a while. So when you’re 15, the swing is like plus-or-minus 10 years. One day you’ll act like you’re 25, and the next day like you’re 5 again.

So Perl 6 still has some maturing to do, fershure. That doesn’t mean we don’t love her any less on the days she’s throwing tantrums and driving us crazy. It just means, well, I guess it just means she’s family, and you love family through thick and thin. Because you trust family to turn thin back into thick someday.

And we’re all her extended family, gathered here today. They say it takes a village to raise a child. But never has there been such a child, or such a village! When you get a chance to look at your program tomorrow after your hangover wears off, just look at the list of benefactors in back. There are over 800 names of people who actively contributed to the development of Perl 6, one way or another. And undoubtedly there are a few names missing from the list.

You are a great bunch of people. All of you. Not just the closest members of the family. The family realized long ago that some of the most valuable guidance a growing computer language can get comes from outside the immediate family. It comes from friends and acquaintances who can have more perspective than someone who is always close. That’s why it takes a village.

Maturity is a fractal entity, and operates on many different scales. You all have been a proxy for the wide, wide world that Perl 6 is going out into. And it’s a rough world out there. Perl 6 is ready for some of it, thanks to you.

Of course, she’s still just 15. She does some things really well now. Her communication skills are pretty good, and she is very polite when she can’t understand you. She can carry on several conversations at once. She’s getting pretty good at math, and shows skill in manipulating objects of various sorts. She loves foreign languages, and all those funny characters.

But she’s still a deliberate child, and sometimes seems to be thinking too hard when learning something. That’s okay. She’ll get faster and more efficient over the next several years, as her brain rewires itself into full adulthood. She’ll learn new things, about the world and about herself. But I don’t think her personality will change much, that’s pretty obvious by now.

And that’s because her personality really comes from all of you. You’ve all loved her into existence, and now she’s ready to pass that love on to others who haven’t met her yet.

We all get really excited when a rocket takes off. TimToady tells me about getting up in the wee hours of the morning to watch Mercury, Gemini, and Apollo rockets take off. I’m too young to remember those, but we have our own thrilling developments to track. Me, I was very happy to see a SpaceX rocket stick its landing this week. After several fender benders…

[another inaudible comment]

I’m ignoring you. Be careful. We’ve gotten really, really good at ignoring certain kinds of people. Don’t be one of them.

Really, I feel sorry for the people who are only happy when they have something to be unhappy about.

Anyway, launching Perl 6 into the world is a lot like a rocket launch. A lot of excitement during the countdown, that hold-your-breath moment when you wonder if it’s really going to go up or explode. That’s where we are now. The main engines are lit, the clamps are letting go. It’s all very dramatic, mostly because nothing much seems to be happening right now.

But that’s not what a rocket is about. Drama is not what a rocket wants to do. A rocket wants to go up, faster and faster and faster. It’s not about position. It’s not really even about velocity. It’s about acceleration.

[raises glass]

So, I give you Perl 6. She is free to fly. May she have joy in her existence. May she have joy in discovering the world. May she accelerate as long as she will! Cheers!

Day 24 – Seeing Wrong Right

There are all kinds of things I could’ve written about here, but none of them felt quite right. So I decided to write a few wrongs instead.

This year I had the privilege of experiencing a triple retinal detachment. Fortunately, they did two surgeries to correct this. Unfortunately, despite the surgeries, I ended up with a blind spot in half my macula and a paralyzed iris, stuck halfway open. Fortunately, this was all in my “bad” eye, so if I look out the right eye, meaning the wrong eye, things look a little wrong, but if I look out the right eye, meaning the left eye, things still look fine. It’s all very confusing, unless you’re the one looking out the eyes in question, in which case everything is completely clear, except for the fuzzy bits. From the outside, I just look a little crazy, but that’s nothing new.

Similarly, people inside the Perl 6 community have a different viewpoint from people outside the community. We often fret about this “echo chamber” effect, but that’s a problem that will become self-correcting as Perl 6 comes into more widespread use. But for now, it does induce a few distortions in outsiders’ perceptions of our community.

One thing that has never been quite clear to folks outside the community is how our design process works. To the people inside the community, it’s clear that the process works quite well, and that’s why Perl 6 just keeps getting better all the time. Every month we make a new release that is more performant and closer to the ideal of Perl 6 as expressed in the design docs and spec tests, even as those design docs and spec tests continue to converge on an implementable and optimizable design. The whirlpool methodology works. Eventually.

But this whirlpool that we find so strangely attractive depends on a kind of feedback loop that many projects do not achieve, and I think that part of the problem is that these projects get trapped by an inadequate view of the nature of wrongness. They see wrong wrong, as it were. In contrast, we try to see wrong right. Or at least righter.

And that’s really the first step, learning not to ask either/or questions. Most design decisions are not binary, because most ideas are not completely right or wrong. Instead, their degree of rightness is kinda truthy. Which makes them righty or wrongy, I guess. So the first step to figuring out right and wrong is to see how they are mixed together in various contexts. And maybe we have an unfair advantage here. This was a relatively easy principle for the Perl 6 community to learn, because as the original RFCs pointed out, Perl 5 is obviously a mixture of righty and wrongy ideas. That’s why we decided to do Perl 6, after all.

Now, Santa Claus knows that most kids are really a mixture of naughty and nicey. So the next step is to zoom out from ideas or features and also allow the people in your project to be a mixture of wrongy and righty, naughty and nicey. Several decades ago people used to talk a lot about “egoless” programming, but that’s not really what we’re doing. We all have our egos here, but somehow we’ve managed (mostly) to attach those egos to higher community ideals rather than to individual ideas or implementations. This frees people to experiment.

The social contract, frequently expressed as “forgiveness > permission”, really means that you have permission to try things out that might turn out right, as long as the rest of us have permission to back them out again if they turn out to be not-so-right. This operates on different scales, from small bug patches to complete attempts at implementation. We don’t promise to use a particular idea or module or implementation, but we do promise to learn from it, and to learn why it is suboptimal if we don’t use it.

It seems our modern western culture always has to find someone to blame, and even in our community we don’t promise not to blame anyone if something goes haywire. On the other hand, in our community, blame is merely a reason for considering someone human, and forgiving them. It’s not a mechanism for determining pecking order.

So we argue a lot on our IRC channel, but many of us take great delight in arguing both sides of any issue. Eventually we either reach a consensus, or decide we don’t know enough yet, so we’d better argue again later when we know more. Occasionally I have to invoke rule #1, “Larry is always right”—but not as often as you might think. Note that we also have rule #2, “If Larry changes his mind, he’s still right”—which is about letting Larry make mistakes, because Larry knows his brain is a mixture of wrongy and righty too.

So in a sense, this entire Perl 6 process is just a large, complicated experiment that we expect to have mixed success with, because we know our own mental limitations. And we hope this also gives us some empathy with our end users.

Once you’ve decided that mistakes are part of the creative process, you can pretty much view the entire evolution of Perl as a dialectic succession of mistakes and corrections. The original Perl design was a mistake. Letting Perl get typecast as a “CGI scripting language” in order to prototype the Web was a mistake. Letting the community try to redesign Perl was a mistake, hence most of the RFCs were mistakes. Or at least many of the proposed solutions in the RFCs were mistakes, and there was no coherence at all to ideas for fixing Perl 5.

The various attempts at implementation can be viewed as unsuccessful experiments. The early implementors prohibited me from working on the implementation. This may have been a mistake. Nowadays the implementors allow me to work on the implementations, which is certainly a mistake. :)

Another way things go wrong in a design is to pick the wrong principle for guidance. Most of the design principles we derived from thinking about the RFCs can be easily be abused when taken to extremes. And we’ve got lots of principles to pick from.

Just for the fun of it, this last year I finally went back through the 361 original RFCs and reread them to see how we did. (Maybe that’s why my retina detached…) What struck me was how many of Perl 6’s current design principles trace directly back to one or more of the RFCs. Of course, many of these principles came from elsewhere, but we decided to apply them in the new design. After I’d annotated my list of RFCs, I tried to give a talk on them, but there were just too many principles to talk about. Here is a list of principle we’ve used in the design, in no particular order:

☞ Don’t just do the first thing that occurs to you.
☞ YAGNI. (You Ain’t Gonna Need It)
☞ Self-clocking code produces better syntax error messages.
☞ Band-aids won’t regrow your limbs.
☞ Torment the implementors on behalf of the users.
☞ One-pass parsing is darn near mandatory for an extensible, braided language.
☞ Kill two birds with one stone.
☞ Avoid lists of exceptions the user has to memorize.
☞ Think ahead. (You think that’s cute this year…)
☞ Unifications can simplify things, sometimes at little cost.
☞ There’s no reason for an error message to be LTA (Less Than Awesome).
☞ Watch out for XY problems.
☞ There are not enough sigils in ASCII to classify everything. Choose wisely.
☞ Choose the right default, the one that enhances readability when omitted.
☞ Larry is not omniscient.
☞ Stick with Perl’s operator-rich philosophy.
☞ Discourage unrelated overloading of existing operators; define new ops instead.
☞ Don’t buy that special tool you see on TV.
☞ DIHWIDT. (Doctor, it hurts when I do this…)
☞ Hang things on the right peg—and if there isn’t one, install one.
☞ If you’re gonna generalize, do it harder, but not too hard.
☞ Pragmas are like vice grips: they’re the wrong tool for any job, but they’ll do any job.
☞ Languages with Do-What-I-Mean autodeclarations too often Don’t-What-I-Mean.
☞ People really get attached to their preferred methods of sloppy thinking.
☞ Question authority, especially your own.
☞ Avoid accidental genericity. Intentional genericity is okay though.
☞ Late binding sometimes causes your program to be late.
☞ Major features should fix lots of things.
☞ Grammatical categories can create a system of related precedence droppers.
☞ If you’re going to reduce the power of a construct, maybe remove it instead.
☞ Little languages (such as regexes) don’t have to violate one-pass parsing.
☞ Replace weak features with stong ones that degenerate to the weak case.
☞ Plan to know more someday.
☞ Don’t multiply entities without reason.
☞ Sometimes it’s worth making a feature pervasive, such as topicization.
☞ Don’t reinvent OO poorly.
☞ “Everything is an object” doesn’t mean it’s all method calls.
☞ Operational definitions are often weaker than declarative definitions.
☞ Even declarative definitions are implemented by operations at compile time.
☞ There are always tradeoffs.
☞ Good ideas go nowhere without a champion.
☞ Don’t punish the innocent with the guilty.
☞ Math just is. Don’t make people declare it.
☞ The identity is the most important part of the API; the right method on the wrong object is always wrong.
☞ People are like sheep, and will wander out any open gate.
☞ Save your money for power tools.
☞ No battle plan survives first contact with the enemy, or the second, or the third…
☞ The waterbed theory of complexity means if you push here, it goes up over there, unless there’s a leak.
☞ Generalizing is often cheaper than specializing.
☞ Bad features are sometimes not intrinsically bad, but just in the wrong context.
☞ Introspection is nearly always a design smell.
☞ You can’t be both eager and lazy simultaneously. Duh.
☞ Conserve your brackets. ASCII has so few of them.
☞ Encourage Unicode operators, yet provide ASCII workarounds.
☞ Sometimes it’s worthwhile to provide more than one way to do it; sometimes one way is enough.
☞ Fundamental unifications don’t have to hurt. If they do, maybe you’re persecuting the user.
☞ Easy things should be easy, and hard things should be possible (aka “Huffman coding”).
☞ The degenerate case should make sense.
☞ Remove artificial discontinuities (such as special-casing negative subscripts).
☞ Sometimes it’s better to leave where you are and approach the design from a different direction.
☞ Don’t plan to confuse things without a really good reason.
☞ Allow last-ditch escape hatches such as BEGIN and EVAL, but try to take away all their use cases.
☞ Premature failure (always throwing exceptions) is often a kind of premature optimization.
☞ Sometimes you have to retarget your shallow principles to a deeper level.
☞ Perl is not intended so much as a first language as it is a last language.
☞ All generalizations are false, including this one.

Arguably it was also a mistake to adopt so many principles. :)

Despite all these mistakes, a bunch of stubbornly optimistic people keep working on Perl 6. And somehow, after all the years of mistakes, we’ve managed to come out with something rather nice.

And now we’re talking about releasing Perl 6.0.0 “officially” sometime in 2015. After all these years of refusing to name a date, maybe this is a big mistake. On the other hand, maybe NOT announcing would be a mistake.

Either way, it doesn’t really matter, because there’s no stopping Perl 6 now. After a few final tweaks, sometime in 2015 we’ll finally be at a point where we can just decide when to tag the next release as 6.0.0.beta. And maybe we’ll keep it in beta until 2015-12-25 or so.

Of course, I could be wrong.

But what is certainly right is this: someday the Whos will start singing, all the Grinches of the world will be surprised, and perhaps a few of them will decide to be not quite so wrong. And they will be welcomed to our song, because we really do believe in forgiveness.

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas.

Day 24 – Advent Ventures

Here at the end of megayears of human adventure,
we schedule a silent night to stop time,
once again awaiting the next advent
of the answer to our questionable venture.

    Are we there yet?

After a gigayear or so of slogging from slime to silicon
mercifully forgetting (most of) the unmerciful past,
and the scars left by unnatural nature upon our pedigree,
we now remember to remember the future once more.

    Are we there yet?

So in this month, 26 year-moments after the advent of Perl,
(including 13 year-eternities of precocious brat sisterhood)
our little family celebrates, 24 tales at a time,
its victories in the struggle to find our way home.

    Are we there yet, Daddy, are we there yet?

We follow after all those who wander but are not lost:
We follow Abraham, looking for a city because it isn't there yet;
We follow Strider, guarding the hobbits who will redistribute the future;
We follow Magi and wizard, scholar and explorer, saint and scientist.

    I wonder as I wander out under the sky...whether I'm lost yet...

But wise man or hobbit, we must all take that journey in the dark,
groping ahead for the path to better air and a little hope,
following the encapsulated starlight past monsters and chasms
out to a land where the weary can rest, and be healed of grief.

    "Wait, what do you mean, I can't go there?" —Gandalf

We must all wander in this desert for forty years,
burying the bones of naysayers and yaysayers alike,
so that their children can someday cross the Jordan
into a land flowing with milk and honey and fancy new phones!

    "Wait, what do you mean, I can't go there?" —Moses

We carry these old stories to the future,
cadences to chant over the confusion of the road,
backpacks full of epics, pockets stuffed with tales,
leaving our own litter of anecdotal evidence behind us.

    You haven't heard some of the good ones yet.

So kids, along with the old stories, pack a few new tools,
light but powerful tools that will help you and help you help us.
The lightest tools, the most powerful tools, are ideas,
so pack lots and lots of 'em. I'll wait here while you do.

    I'm here yet. Which means I'm not there yet. Hurry up!

Pick some good friends, and let some good friends pick you.
Take turns waiting patiently, running impatiently,
or walking hopefully, crawling hopelessly,
standing up yet again defiantly. Or woozily, that works too.

    Be the protagonist some of the time, yet not all of the time.

Trust your journey to provide you with new companions;
trust your new companions to provide you with your journey.
Be prepared to say your eternal hellos and temporary goodbyes.
(No one's ever ready for the temporary hellos and eternal goodbyes.)

    And I'm not sure I want to be there quite yet.

Enjoy the companions your journey gives today, for life is bittersweet.
Enjoy the bittersweet songs and the bittersweet beer.
Enjoy the bitter fights and sweet hugs.
And, yes, enjoy the resulting bruises, but not too much.

    Enjoy knowing that you're not there yet.

Welcome, my friends, to the here, and to the not-there-yet.
Welcome to the clan's quantum superposition of joy and grief and longing.
Welcome to our ongoing effort to steal more of that Promethean fire
that burns too fast yet never fast enough to fit the firepits of our lives.

    Are we getting warmer yet?

As they say, "Give a man a fire..." Hold that thought, some breaking news...
This just in: Fire from heaven is now free and open-sourced?! Well, huh...
Seems a blogger heard some angels singing popup advent adverts in the cloud?
Hmm...better do some fact checking...hang in there...tum tiddly tum...

    Darn flakey connection...almost there...

Well, hey, whaddya know?! The physicists figured it out.
The whole universe has just finished compiling without error...
Now they're looking for someone to debug the silly thing;
Hey, I know, I'll just use the Perl 6 test suite.

    [ you have thousands of problems...]

Did you say something?

    (louder) Does sanity test #1 pass yet? What's the output?

The road goes ever on and on,
Over the river and through the woods,
You take the high road, and I'll take the low road,
We're all bound for the Promised Land.

[TimToady gets blessed and starts directing the choir of Perl Pilgrims.]
We're marching to Zion,
Beautiful, beautiful Zion,
We're marching upward to Zion, that beautif—

    You can't go there.

Wait, what do you mean, I can't go there?

    Bugfix #1: kill all the bad poets.


Day 24 – Yule the Ancient Troll-tide Carol

When you open your gift on Christmas Eve, you discover a mirror in which you can see yourself. On the mirror is etched the statement:


It doesn’t look at all like a car mirror though. It seems quite flimsy, in fact, though it’s made of some rather tough material that seems to defy breakage despite your best efforts as a two-year old…

“WTF? How did the mirror show me a picture of my younger self?”

You bend the mirror this way and that, and it shows you not just embarrassing views of yourself in the past, but also pictures of yourself as you might be someday in the future, both good and bad.


Suddenly you feel a strong tug on your innards, and your vision shifts; instead of looking at the mirror from the outside, you’re looking at it from the inside. You can still see all the same reflections of yourself, but you also see other people, still outside the mirror, looking in at you as a picture of their own younger or older self.

Apparently, you’ve been sucked into a hyper-mirror, in an accidental sort of way.

You are now a member of the Perl 6 community. We (including you) will now give you (including us) the gift of ourselves as we would like to be someday.

In other words, you have been hacked! Borged, even! But you might learn to like it.

Perl is not just a technology; it’s a culture. Just as Perl is a technology of technological hacking, so too Perl is a culture of cultural hacking. Giving away a free language implementation with community support was the first cultural hack in Perl’s history, but there have been many others since, both great and small. You can see some of those hacks in that mirror you are holding.  Er…that is holding you.

The second big cultural hack was demonstrating to Unix culture that its reductionistic ideas could be subverted and put to use in a non-reductionistic setting. Dual licensing was a third cultural hack to make Perl acceptable both to businesses and the FSF. Yet another well-known hack was writing a computer book that was not just informative but also, gasp, entertaining! But these are all shallow hacks. The deep hack was to bootstrap an entire community that is continually hacking on itself recursively in a constructive way (well, usually).

Perl 6 continues this fine tradition of “positive trolling”. You know, in the olden days you could say “troll” to mean something happy and boisterous, as in “troll the ancient yuletide carol”. That’s the kind of trolling we do, especially here in the Advent Calendar (one of the finest examples of the community recursively constructing itself). There are many other examples as well.

If you look at, you will see several cultural hacks right there on the front page. The most obvious one is the butterfly, Camelia, but she represents a number of other hacks through image and words. As an image, she says:

  • Perl 6 is fun.
  • Perl 6 is organic.
  • Perl 6 is attractive.
  • Perl 6 is about clarity.
  • Perl 6 is personal and relational.
  • Perl 6 is a result of metamorphosis.
  • Perl 6 is both primitive and elaborate.
  • Perl 6 is friendly to women and children.

On the flip side, the image also says:

  • Perl 6 is not about sterile corporate image.
  • Perl 6 is not achingly beautiful, just pretty.
  • Perl 6 is not ill-behaved like a camel.
  • Perl 6 is not friendly to grinches.

It is on this visceral level that Camelia has turned out to be a most useful cultural hack, that tells us with a fair degree of certainty who the grinches are who want to steal Christmas. Every community has to deal with an influx of potentially poisonous people, and having an obvious target like Camelia to complain about induces such people to wave a flag reading: “Hey, I’m a troll. Hug me.”

And that’s another cultural hack in the Perl 6 community. We believe in hugging trolls. Up to a point.

You can see this in Camelia’s words, when she says you can participate only if “you know how to be nice to all kinds of people”. Trolls are people too, and we know how to be nice to them. (When we are not nice to trolls, it’s because we decided not to be, not because we don’t know how.)

You see, some of us were trolls once too. As in our mirror metaphor above, we are all looking at each other as we travel together in our journey through life. Many of us hope to end up better people than we are today; we also realize we were worse people in the past. But there are many people who have not made that commitment yet to get better. Some of these uncommitted folks are currently trolls. Some trolls are evil, but many are simply ignorant of a better way.

So when we say we hug trolls, what we really mean in technical terms is that we don’t pay much attention to your position when you join us, however odious that position might be. Instead, we look at the first and second derivatives of your position. To give us time to differentiate, we typically perform a bit of verbal aikido to let you express some of your deeper yearnings while you think you are merely tormenting us.

If your position is bad but your velocity seems to be good, we will certainly try to keep you around until your position is good as well. You want to be good. We can help with that.

If your position is bad, and your velocity is bad, then we’ll look for signs that your velocity might be getting less bad, which is to say you have a positive acceleration. You don’t yet want to be good, but perhaps you want to want to. We may be able to help with that too. If the acceleration stays positive, eventually the velocity and position will come around too.

In short, there are grinches, but some grinches will repent. We want to give them the chance. Sometimes this involves singing when the grinch steals all the presents.

But some of you grinches will never repent. Did we mention that Camelia has a 3-meter wingspan? And that she likes to suck the brains from unrepentant grinches? Not only that, but Camelia’s larval form was a camel, so she can spit too. You really, really don’t want to have Camelia sucking your brain and then spitting.

But most people don’t need to have their brains either sucked or spat. Often they just need them washed. Once people catch on to the meta-philosophy of Perl, they usually find the search for technical and cultural convergence to be a Great Adventure, and much more fun than simply making people unhappy, which is too easy.

We hope you like your new hyper-mirror, and we hope you’ve enjoyed (or will enjoy) reflecting on some of these posts. Please have a Great Advent to a Great Adventure.

Fa la la!